I went to his sister, Carol's house with the rest of the people who went to the graveside service. Once we got there we waited quite a while for his sisters, Patty and Debbie to come back with some food and a big white layer cake that had a cross on it, also done in white. I did get to talk to Patty's friend Christy who had driven up with her family from North Carolina to attend the funeral. She was very nice. She and her husband and son stayed at Sean's house. They got in Monday morning around 1 am. At about the time I was just starting to relax and enjoy talking to Sean in the kitchen. I heard a noise behind me and saw his mother looking very strange, me and other people went up to support her and she started to fall back and she had water coming out of her mouth. As she coughed the water out it went down and the warm water dripped onto my feet, kind of freaking me out. I didn't know what was wrong with her but she got a lot heavier so I sort of let my body get under hers and leaned her against the counter. A young man came up behind me and was holding her up from behind me (Joey?). Since I was between them I told him why don't you take her, so I manuvered out from behind her and he took over People started to call Carol and then they started to call out to call 911. Then something came up and she started to breath. She had swallowed a big piece of chicken. After she said something and stood there with Joey holding her up for while, Joey helped her into the bedroom. She laid on the bed. After that I needed to go home. I felt drained and nervous. I said goodbye not to long after that. I did say good bye to each of Sean's sisters. Carol looked exhausted and pale. I said to her "I know, no I don't know how you feel, I couldn't, but I know it hurts, alot. I will be praying for you". She said "You are just super". I said goodbye to Sean and then left.

The weekend and beginning of the week were tiring, and emotionally draining. However last week the weather was beautiful and I got to ride my beautiful and sound Sonny. He behaved well.

The weekend and beginning of this week were tiring because of the goodbye ceremonies for Sean's dad. The viewing lasted on Sunday from 2-4 and 6-8. I attended church that morning and ate lunch at church. Then I left the church right after the 1:00 service and went to Ott's Funeral home in Irwin. I went unsure of how long I would stay. I went early though because I wanted a chance to talk to Sean and I knew that as people started to get there things would get crazy. So I went in, and signed the book. Then I went up to the receiving line. His sister Debbie was first and he was next to her. I thought of shaking his hand but his eyes and body language seemed to be asking for a hug. So I smiled with my eyes and put my arms and hands out for a hug. He hugged me for quite a while and kept patting my back with both of his hands. His emotion and desire to reach out to someone for support were communicated to me through his hug. Then he introduced me to his sister, Debbie. She smiled and said I've heard so much about you. It's always Charlotte, Charlotte, Charlotte. She said that we need to go out for dinner sometime, that she had been trying to get Sean to invite me to go with her and him. I told her that he had told me and I had been surprised that she even knew about me. Then I greeted and gave a hug to Patty and her kids Clayton and Crystal. Then I got to another boy, and they told me it was Quinton. I didn't even recognize him and his mother Carol, I didn't recongize her either. When Sean reminded them of when they came out to see Gusty Wind then they all remembered. Carol said she remembered my face. Both Quinton and Clayton seemed excited remembering the memory of that visit. Then I got to his mom. The others told her that I am Charlotte, Sean's friend. She gave me a hug and said thank you for coming dear. Then I noticed a man next to her. They introduced him as Jerry, Sean's brother and Patti his wife. We politely shook hands and said hello. Sean's great nephew, 4 3/4 year old Nathan was sitting on a chair behind the receiving line drawing on a piece of paper with a pen. He had no activities to do and his mother was trying to watch him and greet people at the same time. I had brought some sticker books for him. I asked his mother and grandmother if I could give some gifts to Nathan. They said yes go ahead. Then I sat down with him and showed him the presents. He like them, so I asked if I could stay and watch him while they did the receiving line. So I stayed with him until 4 o clock when the viewing hours were over. He enjoyed looking at the books with me. A great number of Sean's church friends came. Many of them came as a result of my phone calls. Our singles friends who came included Lisa Lundie, Carol and Carl Benson, Joe Leurquin, Annamarie Keller, Louise Dufford, Ellen Procter, Jonathon Procter and his girlfriend and her cousin. Also Amy and Jayson showed up as well. Jim Kelly called Sean to offer his condolences on Saturday. The church people who showed up were: Eichelbergers, Halfertys, Millers, Parkers, Me, Meinerts (?), Mom and Dad. Herky Pollack showed up sometime when we weren't there or aware of him and he left a substancial financial cash gift. Every visitor was a great comfort and encouragement to Sean. He was very thankful to me for making all the calls. I did not tell him all of whom I called so there were some suprises that came in the door.

When Jeff came through he prayed with Sean, Pat, Clayton, & Crystal. At first the room remained noisy with chatter, but then as people realized they were praying all of the immediate family bowed their heads and closed their eyes and the noise in the room quieted until all we could hear was Jeff praying.

Later they needed to go get the food from Friendship and I offered to go get it and drop it off at Sean's mother's house. They said that would be great. Sean said I could stay and eat. However I wasn't sure how comfortable I felt doing that. Once I got the food and delivered it Patty and another family member asked me to stay and eat with them, so I did.

I stayed and ate with them. The family was very kind to me. Mike came later and stayed until about 5:30 which was about the same time that I left. Sean's sister Debbie commented on how Friendship did more for them than their church did. I told her people at Friendship are loving and kind and genuine. She said and Sean is a member of that church. Like she was very proud of that fact.

I went to Procters after that because I had told Ellen that I would be over. Jonathon was gone but Louise, Ellen and Annamarie were there. It was good to see them again. Then I went back to the funeral home and stayed about an hour.

I got home around 8 pretty tired out and emotionally drained. I left the house again around 8:30 to get to the funeral home by 9:30. I got there around 9:15 before most of the family except for Carol and her son. Sean was glad to see me there. Every looked so sad. Then the priest came and the family was in the room with the casket and the other people were in the next room. The priest said some prayers and then instructed friends from the next room to come in and look at the body one last time, then the family each looked at him one last time. Then we went to our cars, a bagpipest played a couple of songs including Amazing Grace last and the Pall bearers (Sean was one) carried the coffin to the hearse and then got into a limo and a car. Then everyone drove to the church, the mourners parked right by the church and went in and sat at reserved seats then after a while the pallbearers brought the casket in and they parked it in the middle aisle right in front of the "altar". Then the priest said the mass. Then the pallbearers took the body out and the mounrners followed. They put the casket back in the hearse and then got into the cars/limo. Then we drove to the cemetary .."union circle" I think. We drove way far back into there..then we parked and the pall bearers carried the coffin up to this small paviolion tent with no side and sat it on a stand. It was a hard carry up the little hill with several 2 teenagers and 2 older men in addition to Sean and his brother carrying the casket. Some of the crowd could get under the awning and the rest stood outside in the grass. Sean and his family sat across from us facing us and the casket with an aisle between them and the casket. The priest said some stuff, then the miltary from the American Legion did some honors, shot their guns and folded and presented the flag to Mrs. Cody. Then Patty White and Pat Cody sang "Danny boy" everyone was given roses, the mourners laid a single rose on the casket then the family did , as we the friends walked down to the cars, the family. I saw them looking at and leaning against the coffin. I saw Sean come down the hill, looking bad. The emotion was flowing from his body as he was doubled over...sobs coming from within his body and tears out of his eyes, but not a fullfledged balling like a woman might do. He double over briefly a couple of times. I had thought about getting into my car and either going home or meeting them at Carol's for lunch as they had asked us all to do, but I thought I better see him before I left. So I had started up there, but when I saw his emotion I walked even faster back up that small hill to him. We met and I just murmured "hey you, hey you" like I would to a small child and put my arms around him he held me too. I could feel his body wracking with sobs and his head leaned lightly against mine. I told him "it'll be ok, it'll be ok". He said "I know" through his emotion. The words we spoke did not matter, it was the act of being a comfort and sharing his burden that mattered.

Sean called me on Friday morning to tell me that his Dad died early that morning. (Nov 10). I had just gotten off of Reo (a naughty pony I was training) and was trying to get ready to catch the horses for the trail ride when the phone rang. I answered and it was him. He asked if I could talk or was I busy. I said, that I was a little busy but that I could talk some. He told me that his Dad had died and that Crystal his niece had been there with his dad "monitoring" him. She said that he passed away peacefully.

I told him I was so sorry. I reminded him "aren't you glad Brian went to visit him Tuesday". Brian went at Sean's request to visit his Dad. He brought Mrs. Cody a candle (he came unaccounced) and asked if he could pray with his dad. First he read to him about heaven, from revelation, then he said "if I'm worth my salt as a pastor I have to ask you how you will get to heaven," and Mr. Cody said, "Jesus. " At some point Mr. Cody closed his eyes and described the fruit trees in heaven, with such vivid detail it was like he was seeing it in a vision. Brian said it was a very powerful encounter.

Sean said he was very glad that Brian had visited. I told him you will see him again someday, in heaven. I told him that I really thought he had gotten saved. Sean said that he heard his dad saying in his sleep "wretched sinner that I am"..he was definately thinking about what Sean and Patty had shared with him out of the gospel.

Sean asked me to call the church people. So I called Hipples, Millers, Parkers, Amy, Jim Kelly, Joe and Annamarie Keller. I emailed Aunt Elice, Dai, Premjit, and Katie Hartman. Then today I called with more accurate information: Louise, Joe, Jim Kelly, Ellen Procter, Hipples, Hines, Carol Benson, and Lisa Lundie. I need to call Annamarie with the corrected viewing times in the morning.

I sent a plant to Sean's mom's house. Tonight he called me and thanked me for it. He thought it was really nice. He was happy Jim Kelly had called him..LOL I had given Jim the phone number. He wanted to have Parkers number because his family wants to borrow the gym to have a meal in on Monday after the funeral.

Viewing 2-4,6-8 Sunday at the Ott Funeral Home
Departing prayers Monday at the Ott Funeral Home
Funeral 10 at the Immaculent Conception Catholic church..
I get to miss work I guess. I wasn't planning to go to the graveside, but I might. I'll see how it goes.
Catholic take on a funeral ugg. I guess I will call up my boss and tell her I need the whole day off.

Last night my sleep was disturbed. I kept dreaming about Sean's situation with his dad passing away. I guess I was empathizing.

In other news, until today the weather has been beautiful. I rode Sonny Tues-Friday..he has been great! Especially yesterday.

Democrats won the Congress narrowly. So I guess I'm ready for the rapture now!

Just after I wrote the last blog I had one of the strangest events of my life happen.
I went to BP for a snack. When I pulled in, I saw a young man and a young woman aruging. I only heard the man talking loudly. I drove past them to park near the door as normal. However something about it seemed strange so I backed the car up so that I could observe what was happening. At first it seemed like they were only having a verbal argument and I decided to stay out of it, but then he put his hand on her arm and was trying to pull her away from the car that was parked there. He seemed to be pulling her harder and harder and somehow he and the girl ended up on the side of the car closer to me (driver's side) and I saw her fall into the car onto another girl that was sitting with the driver's car door open and her legs out. I thought he had pushed the first girl down. So I yelled to him to stop touching her. He yelled that she fell down. Something the other girl confirmed. So I backed the car up and around behind their car so that I could see better and put down the windows on that side of the car. By this time he was restraining the girl from behind. He had her hands up by her shoulders and she was struggling to get away from him. I yelled very meaningly that if he didn't let go of her I would call the cops. So, he said, she's my fiance, this is none of your business . I said let go of her or I will call the cops. The other girl made a signal to me , that basically said yes call the cops. So I said, I'm serious I already pressed 9, now I'm pressing 1. At that point, he let go of her and went back into the store. Once he let go of her the girl was crying and her face was flushed red. I drove my car back towards the store door but stopped so that I could see what the girls were doing. The girl's friend, yelled thank you, and I yelled (still upset from the incident) I suggest that you choose your friends more carefully in the future. She nodded yes and the girls got into the car and left. I drove the car close to the door and debated if I should go into the store or not. My nerves were stressed and my one leg was trembling. However I decided to go in, partly because I wanted my snack and didn't want to let that guy scare me and partly because I was curious about what he would do. As I entered the store, I heard a male customer, say-don't swear in front of women. I heard the guy say, I just had a fight with my girl friend. the male patron said well you still shouldn't be swearing in front of the women. Then the guy went back to the back, got his jacket and walked out of the store past me (I was at the register) he looked straight at me as he walked out but he didn't say anything. I was afraid of what he would do. Then I followed him at a distance out to the lot, and saw that he walked across the lot and then across route 819. I have no clue were he went. He is an employee up there, and in my opinion he deserves to be fired. He was suppose to be working at the time. I have no idea what he was trying to accomplish in that argument except to somehow control the girl. I wonder what he would do behind closed doors if that is what he does in broad day light at a public parking lot.

He is about 5' 8" has short hair and a thin beard that is carefully trimmed. He is slim build. This happened at BP gas and go gas station at about 3:30 in the afternoon on 3. The girl he was arguin with was an Asian (hispanic)? girl medium build, fairly long hair her friend was Caucasion. They had a sports type of convertible car, I don't remember the color but not white or black..red?? maybe

Well, my schooling has become more intense. I am not taking 2-3 credit classes every semester. The classes are divided into 8 week sessions. The first one I took was very intense, but I made it though with a 93.49% which in that class=A. Finally an A in my program! I thought I would never get above a B. Yes it's a 90, 80 70, 60 scale, but still I did it.

Now I am taking a theories class. I have a 15 page paper due at the end of the 8 weeks. So I need to hustle to keep up. I'm up to date almost right now. I slowed down due to being sick for the last 3 days. I hope to pick up the pace now that I seem to be getting better.

I had to put Duchess to sleep last Friday. She was 15 and her cancer really overtook her. At the end whe was throwing up, and and unable to get off the floor. Once I took her to the vet her breathing got worse and blood was coming from her mouth. So I am glad I put her to sleep, but wish that I had decided to stay in the room until she was put to sleep so that they would not have delayed. I didn't want to stay so the tech took her to a back room to wait. I hope they did it soon. The place was so busy that I worried about that. I had bad dreams for 2 nights after imagining her waiting and other things. I won't make that mistake again.

I went to Montana oct 19-25. The trip was nice, but I always find that type of travel to be stressful. I am not real comfortable in the RV. I don't like the bed. But, it's cheaper and more convenient than a hotel and I value the privacy. I played cars a lot with Daniel and Ruth. We let the kids ride a couple of times and went to Butte one day for groceries. I got there a day later than I intended due to a cancelled flight out of Latrobe. The Lord knew best. I taught a salvation message that night and then didn't get home until 10? I still hadn't packed a bag due to trying to finish my course and clean up all the house areas (esp the dining room table and my room) that my parents wanted cleaned up. So I guess I needed an extra day. I did get to see my horse on thrusday. I had my flight 4pm thurs rather than 6:40 am. I stayed at the super 8 that night and then drove to suzannes in the morning after a trip to Walmart.

I think Mike and Suzanne are learning about waiting on and depending on God. They have not been able to sell the log house in Ennis. I pray that they can soon.

Sean's unemployment ran out about a week ago. He has never had nothing to fall back on before. I feel for him. I think the Lord is trying to teach him to be more responsible about finding employment rather than depending on unemployment. I hope that he learns quickly so that the Lord can make his situation easier again. He is much more diligent in the job search now. He was suppose to go to Florida for the air force--first it was oct 5, then, nov 20 and now jan 20. He may not go due to needing to get a job. He has money saved, but that will all disappear fast while he lives on it. He hopes to supplement his income by working 1/2 days at the base. Of course when he is desperate, he tends to take ANYTHING that comes along, no matter were it may send him in the world.

I wonder about people I have tried to outreach to. Jill is having touble getting motivated to go to church despite a lack of encouragement from her husband. Ihave been praying for her. Debbie Mathias almost never makes it to church due to poor health (cancer) and a lack of motivation. I seem to lack the motiavtion to help her though this. Or even to remember to pray for her sometimes. I get so self involved especially when I get busy or sick.

My prayer/devotional life has suffered in the last 10 weeks or so.